Stephanie Cole, who has died aged 84, could make a reprimand sound like the most reasonable observation in the world. With her measured delivery, commanding presence and exquisite sense of timing, she became one of British television’s most recognisable actresses. Her agent confirmed that she died on 18 September, having lived with Alzheimer’s disease for several years. Sky News

Cole understood the dramatic possibilities of formidable women. Behind their impatience, she could suggest disappointment; beneath their authority, vulnerability. A raised eyebrow or a carefully held silence often accomplished more than a speech. She trusted the audience to notice.

Born Patricia Stephanie Cole in Solihull on 5 October 1941, she trained at the Bristol Old Vic Theatre School and developed her craft in repertory theatre. She was playing older women while still remarkably young: at 17, she appeared as Madame Arcati, the eccentric medium in Noël Coward’s Blithe Spirit. It was an early indication of her ability to convey a lifetime of experience without having lived it herself. Sky News, biographical record

National recognition came with Tenko, in which she played Dr Beatrice Mason, a physician imprisoned alongside other women in a Japanese internment camp. Her performance brought moral weight to a drama about endurance, deprivation and the difficult obligations people owe one another. The authority that later served her comedy so well was equally convincing under these darker circumstances. Sky News

In Open All Hours, her Mrs Featherstone made an altogether different entrance: severe, watchful and capable of unsettling Ronnie Barker’s Arkwright simply by appearing in his shop. Cole made the character’s disapproval a comic force in its own right.

Her greatest comic creation was arguably Diana Trent, the retired photojournalist in Waiting for God. Living in a retirement home, Diana refused the expectation that age should bring meekness, gratitude or an agreeable disposition. Alongside Graham Crowden’s Tom Ballard, Cole made resistance to condescension richly entertaining. She was only 48 when she began playing the pensioner, and won the British Comedy Award for best television comedy actress in 1992. Career and awards

There was something liberating about Diana. She remained curious, difficult and fully entitled to her opinions. Cole gave her ferocity a purpose: this was a woman insisting that her life still belonged to her.

Later audiences knew Cole as Aunt Joan in Doc Martin and as Sylvia Goodwin, Roy Cropper’s outspoken mother, in Coronation Street. Radio listeners enjoyed her commanding comic presence in Cabin Pressure. Across these parts, she retained the precision of an actress who knew exactly how much emphasis a line required—and when to leave it alone. Selected credits

Appointed OBE in 2005 for services to drama, elderly people and mental health charities, she also devoted considerable energy to work beyond the stage and studio. The Sun’s report of the family announcement

Her lasting achievement was to give women who might otherwise have been treated as supporting figures the unmistakable presence of people with histories, convictions and unfinished business. She made them funny without making them negligible.

British television will remember her voice, her timing and that devastating look. It should also remember the intelligence behind them.